oh shit, jobless.

This blog will be a chronicle of a journey and if it ends where I want it to end, then we'll have succeeded in making this blog segue into a business blog. And, if it doesn't end where I wanted it to end, well then, I hope I gave it a "God's honest shot".
I want to open an independent, niche bookstore/gallery. I have no fucking idea what I am doing. All I know is I have a love for books, tattoos, art and a knack at being good at pointing people in the right direction. So I imagine holes will be dug, walls will be hit, toes will be stepped on (including mine) but I will raise a glass (any alcohol substance will do) and toast to the hope that my defeatist ways do not get the best of me... procrastinator to an ending fault! 
As the story goes:
I quit my job as a tattooer for more than one reason but what it all boiled down to was, unhappiness. I was tired of being unhappy. I kept thinking if I could keep my eye on the pie (opening my own business) I could at least make money while I worked on the whole deal... But the pie just got further and further away. I came home grumpy, tired, feeling defeated by my day. A bottle of wine cured everything, and nothing except talking about it ever got done.
I kept putting it off. "I will read this book about bookstores" "I will start working on a business plan in a month or so... in spring... by next fall" never happened. I have had this idea for well over a year now... and nothing. Just a clock ticking and a liver trying to come up for air occasionally.
So I quit.
I figured if there was anything to light a fire under my ass it would be to let go of my security blanket. The daily grind that makes us a comfortable living but truth was I/we were drinking and eating it all. Although, I do love good food and drink but I don't need it every night.
So here's where it gets tricky for me: I am a great and notorious procrastinator. (Admitting you have a problem is the first step)  I can hardly make a decision in a supermarket isle let alone on what move I need to make next. I shall revert back to prior sentance... I have NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT I AM DOING!!! So I am making lists and reorganizing my house... I figured if I can make order out of a cupboard or a drawer or my entire basement then maybe my brain can apply that to making order out of a business plan.
I may and should probably seek a mentor soon, even if it means paying for it but for now I have my "Small business for Dummies" and "How to open a Bookstore". Step in the right direction... right?
Oh and a Buddhism book so that I remember that I am a nice, humble, loving and loved, talented gal who should not worry so much about all the things that could or could not happen. Cause right "now", all is peachy keen.
Shit happens at any given moment and there is not a whole lot we can do about it, except roll with the punches... Is that enough cliches in one sentence?
Maybe I'll get that shit tattooed on my ribs so I always remember it...
j-